She Had Held Books Before
by ACEo'SPADES
Summary: Toph didn’t know what words looked like. She could never know... One-shot. Post-Tales of Ba Sing Se


Another midquel. Because, as the saying goes, everything happens at Ba Sing Se....and the Western Air Temple, for that matter. Haha.

Inspired by: _Things Not Seen _by Andrew Clements. It, too, has a blind girl in it, and she made me want to write Toph. Besides, I've been writing so much Kataang lately, it's turning my brain to mush. I still love them though, don't worry. Just needed to get this outta my system, and Toph is a rather impatient person...

Disclaimer: I don't own Avatar, nor do I own "A Hymn to Humanity".

* * *

**She Had Held Books Before...**

Toph didn't know what words looked like. She could never know how they spilled over the pages of books, volumes and volumes stacked along the walls of their Ba Sing Se apartment. She could feel them, her fingers traveling tirelessly over their smooth bindings as she walked past the shelves, the wispy papers underneath their covers. But they meant nothing to her.

After the Library in the middle of that earth-forsaken, sand-filled wasteland, Katara had asked Toph if she _"had something against libraries."_

Toph could remember her response very plainly: _"I've held books before, and, I gotta tell you, they don't exactly do it for me." _

Goodness, they might never remember she was blind. If Toph could tease them about it though, it was fine by her...

And yet, stuck in the worst city ever, with nothing better to do than go to The Fancy Lady Day-Spa with Katara, Toph got bored rather quickly. She found herself suddenly obsessing over those books, her fingers wandering over them each day as she passed by them time and time again. She never opened one though. She never even took a book off of the shelf. To read was like trying to feel nothing. It simply didn't work for her, and she knew it.

"_I've held books before..."_

* * *

She felt her father press something into her hands. It was smooth, and felt good on her hands. She turned it over and over, her fingers fiddling and exploring everything like a curious little toddler. Her world remained blank, but she could sense every little detail as her fingers diligently paced around it.

The Master Bei Fong cleared his throat expectantly. "Can you read what that says, darling?"

Toph didn't know what "read" meant. So she simply continued to turn it around, her fingers suddenly prying the book open, the pages spilling wide for her in her lap. She had never held one of these before, at least, she didn't _remember_ ever holding such a thing. And when your world is nothing but blank, you learn to remember every detail you can. So she soaked up everything she could learn from this one object... a book, her father had called it.

Lao heaved a sigh. He didn't understand... they had sat down to a meal together, not long after Toph had returned home. It was the first time she had disappeared, and he was not about to let it happen again. And then, his little daughter had said the most _preposterous_ thing, it was simply _impossible_:

"Dad...mom...?" Toph had said. They both looked up at their little blind girl. "I... I think I can _see_..."

Lao and his wife had stopped eating immediately.

"What did you say, Toph?"

"I..." She said, squirming slightly. "I can see you, Dad."

"What do you mean?" He had asked sharply, almost breathless. Seven years ago, his daughter had been born. Born _blind_. And remained blind for these past seven years... _Impossible_.

"I can see you..." His daughter had replied hesitantly. She pointed to her left, her index finger almost meeting with his nose. "You're right there, dad... aren't you?"

Instantly, Lao stood up, all formalities forgotten. He didn't even bother telling her it's rude to point. Toph's finger was still fixed upon him, but her head remained facing forward like it always had. Lao walked skeptically towards the other side of the room, eyes never leaving his daughter. Her finger followed him all across the dining room. He stopped. So did her finger.

His eyes widened.

"Oh! Oh, Lao!" His wife cried. "She can _see_! Our daughter can _see_!!"

The Head of the Bei Fong Family had rushed in a rather undignified manner over to his massive library. Normally, he would've called in a servant to fetch one for him, but he was suddenly too excited to think straight, and a servant, he felt, would've been much too slow...

Grabbing a book at random, he pulled it from its shelf and walked back into the dining hall. Toph was still in her seat. Anxiety gripping his stomach, Lao pushed the book into her hands.

"Can you read this book?" He asked, almost holding his breath for her reply.

She simply flipped the book around in her hands. She said nothing. She didn't even look down at the book, but instead looked straight ahead as always.

Mouth growing dry, Lao cleared his throat and repeated himself: "Can you read what that says, darling?"

After a few seconds, Toph opened the book. Her hand moved down the length of the page. Her eyes did not travel down to the book. Lao stared long and hard at her eyes. They were green, they were pale. And he realized with a long sigh, they were still _blind_.

"She's blind, Poppy." Lao said stiffly, exhaling heavily. Standing up, he took the book away from her hands. "She's still blind."

"But, dad!" Toph cried aloud. "I can... can _see_ you! You're right there!" She pointed at him again, and Lao grew impatient with her stubborn conviction. After all these seven years, he had believed her to be blind. Then, the instant he believes otherwise, the moment he thought his daughter could see, that his daughter was normal; he was proven wrong. He was made a fool of. And she was still _blind_. Oh, she could hear perfectly, for how else would she know where he was?

Tiny, fragile, helpless, _blind_.

"I don't want to hear any more about it, young lady." Lao said, returning to the head of the table. "You cannot see." He told her, dismissing the angry and confused and undeniably hurt look she gave him now. "You are _blind_."

And Toph didn't know _what_ to believe...

* * *

Holding her arms around herself protectively as she recalled her memory, Toph realized that she still didn't know the difference between seeing her way and seeing normal-people's way.

Now she stood, still facing the shelves of books. Through the wood, Toph could barely sense the vibrations of it's shape. Her hand reached out to touch the shelf, where she knew many leather-bound volumes lay. She felt the different textures of each book, fascinated. Was this what it was like, choosing a book? Did people normally choose books by the way they felt? Toph supposed not... It wouldn't matter anyway; she couldn't_ "read"_. As if to spite her father, she chose one anyways. Even if she couldn't read, it didn't mean she couldn't choose a book.

Feeling special and maybe a little bit foolish, Toph quickly carried the book back to her room, clutching it to her chest.

But sitting down and opening it in her lap again, he fingers crawling over the pages, Toph found very little that was interesting about a book. She supposed it was the difference between blind people and seeing people. _Seeing_ people could "read". _Blind_ people... people like _her_... couldn't. Just holding it wasn't enough satisfaction for her. She wanted to _"read"_.

Toph felt someone approach her door. She hid the book underneath her lap.

"Toph?" It was Katara.

"Sugar Queen?" Toph replied.

"Can I come in?"

"Nothing stopping you." Toph reminded her, sighing in annoyance.

Katara entered the room, curling her legs underneath her and sitting down next to Toph. Toph did nothing.

"Something wrong, Toph?" Katara asked.

_Must she be so nosy?_ Toph thought. "No." She told her definitely. Unconsciously, her legs tightened slightly over where the book was hidden underneath her lap.

"You sure? You looked a little down earlier..."

"I'm fine. And I don't remember asking for an interrogation." Toph said cuttingly. She could barely feel the sag in Katara's shoulders a little as she sighed in defeat. She knew quite well now that dragging information out of Toph was_ not_ worth it—it couldn't be done if she wasn't willing.

"Okay." The waterbender said, standing up to leave. "Just wanted to let you know I'm here... if you need me..."

"I'm_ touched_, Sweetness." Toph told her, placing a hand over her heart mockingly. Katara closed the door.

_Well, there goes your one chance of being read to... _Toph thought dryly. She felt like punching herself with a rock fist.

* * *

Toph spent the next day wandering around the city, all on her own. She had stolen Sokka's book bag (which apparently matched Toph's outfit), and kept her chosen book tucked away inside, safe from whomever wanted to ask. But people were usually the same—they kept mainly to themselves. Fine by _her_.

All Toph needed was to find someone who would read to her. She knew what bards were... vaguely. Her only account of bards was, in fact, her father's opinion of them. He had said something about them once in passing: _"Dirty travelers who don't bother making a decent living, trying to scrape what they can by telling far-fetched fairy tales! Disgraceful!"_ Whether or not The Bei Fong Family Head was right, his daughter certainly didn't know. But Toph knew that the very bard he was talking about had been spreading news of the return of the Avatar. So much for "far-fetched fairy tales".

Wandering the streets of Ba Sing Se, Toph soon realized she didn't know where to look for a bard, a story-teller, _anyone_. This would be a lot harder than she had planned... she figured if she walked around enough, she'd come across someone who would be willing to read to her.

That plan was quickly falling into oblivion: the Lower Ring was a vast sea of tiny shops and apartments and random buildings all crammed up against one another. It was almost claustrophobic down here on the street!

A few times, Toph thought of maybe simply tugging on someone's sleeve and asking if maybe they could read to her. But Toph really couldn't imagine the scene happening with her acting like a poor little blind girl. She hated the idea. However, perusing through the streets was proving to be fruitless. She found no bards or storytellers, and she point-blank _refused _to ask random strangers, politely or otherwise.

And Toph was pretty sure she knew why... More than anything, Toph didn't want it to be a random stranger who read to her. She wanted her _father_ to read to her. Her parents to read to her.

But that was an impossible dream of a little blind girl like her.

Kicking dust into the air with her foot, Toph eventually gave up the search. The young earthbender made her way back through the Lower Ring, past the Middle Ring and finally to the Upper Ring and their little gang's apartment, where her three friends were sure to be. She couldn't help it if her shoulders sagged a just a little bit on the long walk home.

Placing one foot on the stairs leading to the door, Toph heard a bit of a commotion coming from inside the apartment. A hasty rustle of steps across the floor, a few whispers; as if she couldn't hear them:

"...She's coming, hurry!" Twinkletoes' voice.

"Act _natural_!" Snoozles.

Not bothering to wait for them to get into place for their little act—whatever it was— Toph climbed the stone stairs and threw the door wide open.

She was greeted by a strange earth-vision: Sokka was seated on a cushion on the floor. Sweetness and Twinkletoes were direct contact with the earth, but both were situated on the floor as well. The three of them formed a small circle, and both Katara and Aang seemed to be paying attention to what Sokka had to say. Because Sokka was holding an open book. And he was_ reading_...

"Hmm. Didn't know _you_ could read, Snoozles." Toph said casually, shutting the door behind her.

"Toph!" Katara said eagerly. "Sokka was just reading to us. You should listen, it's a really good book..." Toph noticed the slight difference in her voice.

"Really?" Toph asked, slinging Sokka's bag over her head and off her shoulder. She set it down, leaving the book still tucked away inside. "What's happened _so far_?"

"Well..." Aang began, and Toph knew he was about to give her the truth. As if she didn't already know.

"You'll have to find out for yourself!" Sokka cut Aang off. "We wouldn't want to give anything away, now would we...?"

Rolling her eyes, Toph replied in her sarcastic nature: "Right. Because it would be awful if I knew how it all _began._" Sokka scowled.

"Let's start at the beginning then..." Katara suggested. Toph shrugged, but much to everyone else's surprise, she walked forward, sat down, resting her elbow on her knee and propping her chin.

Sokka took this as his cue to begin. He cleared his throat importantly: "Once upon a time..."

Aang cut him off, "Hey, why does _Sokka _get to read?"

"I'm a _great _reader!" Sokka retorted.

"But why can't I?" Aang countered

"Because! You don't have the Official Reader's Pillow." Sokka took the cushion out from underneath him and wagged it in front of Aang's face. "_I _do." As if he had settled the matter, Sokka replaced it on the floor, and was about to sit on it. Smirking, Toph moved the pillow with earthbending, causing Sokka to fall hard on his backside.

"_To-oph_!" Sokka said, rubbing the sore-spot with his hands. "That _hurt_!"

"If you two are done squabbling like a bunch of old_ ladies_," Toph told them, "I'd like to pick out a book." Using her earthbending skills again, Toph bumped Sokka's bag over to her, the book lying within. She pulled it out.

"Read this." She made sure it wasn't a question.

"_Ummm_...Toph?" Sokka asked her as Toph slid it across the floor to him, picking it up in his hands and glancing at the title. "You know this is a _poetry_ book, right?"

Toph did a double-take on the inside, but was careful to not let her surprise show. "_So_...?"

"Nothing, nothing..." Sokka replied hastily, taking the book in his hands and opening it. He read:

"_Descend to earth, their place thy throne;  
__To succour man's afflicted son  
__Each human heart inspire:  
__To act in bounties unconfin'd  
__Enlarge the closed contracted mind,  
__And fill it with thy fire..."_

Despite herself, Toph rather liked how Sokka read. And she wanted to hear how Katara and Aang read as well... It was kind of nice, being read to. Everyone listened to the poem quietly as Sokka continued.

Toph smiled, grateful for her friends. She didn't even have to ask for them to read to her...

"Katara?" Toph whispered.

"Yes?" Katara replied softly.

"How'd you know?"

Katara hesitated, then replied as quietly as she could: "Sokka noticed a book missing from the shelves. You should have heard him, he thought the Dai Li took it and were hiding inside the _walls_..." Toph smirked, tapping the floor with her finger to check, just in case. All clear.

She cracked a smile. Even though Toph _dearly_ wished that it was her father reading to her, having her closest friends read to her would do for now.

* * *

Like it? Hate it? Please comment!

Poem is "A Hymn to Humanity", by Phillis Wheatley. I can't help but see resemblances between that particular part (yeah, it's actually not the beginning of the poem) and Avatar.

I've always wondered if Toph thought that "Seeing" meant earth-vision, and not Eye-seeing. She was probably not told, or did not understand, the concept of seeing through her eyes. She may have assumed at one point that everybody saw as she did, but it simply took her longer to learn (from Badgermoles, haha). And desperate to become "normal" in her parents eyes, she might have tried to tell them. Except they didn't get it. =(


End file.
